Save the drama for your...Barbie?

Hey y'all!  It's been a crazy couple of weeks.  To start, I need a round of applause for this doll right here, because I quit smoking again.  (So did Jennifer Aniston.)  It's been a week, I feel great, a little concerned about the inevitable weight gain of a couple pounds, and I plan to start running again soon.  Not that I've really been taking a break from working out - I finally found a gym that I love that is not outrageously pricey, and I am currently having trouble standing up, sitting down, and walking in general because of one particularly difficult class I took yesterday.  Barbies and weights don't get along, but we are learning to be around each other without "one of us" stomping off in a fit of anger and exhaustion.  I plan on attempting it again tomorrow, along with a yoga class taught by a friend from my esthetics classes.  I am also not a yoga person.  I'm guessing you can tell by now that if I'm not bouncing around, I'm not happy.  And that applies to my life too.  My new job as a receptionist at a salon is going fantastically - plenty of bouncing around.

We've also been getting ready for Halloween around here - the original plan was to be characters from the Wizard of Oz, but as that plan has fallen through, we are officially dressing up as a lion and a ringmaster.  My ringmaster costume came in the mail, and surprise, surprise, the teeny tiny polyester skirt covers, well, just about half of my disproportionately perky ass.  Luckily, I was able to find black tutus yesterday at Wal-Mart, but only in kid's sizes.  I bought two, just in case some sewing was required, because at $5 apiece, and with two nieces, I had nothing to lose, but to my shock, they fit (given, I snapped a few threads in the elastic putting them on), and layered strategically, the length is much more appropriate than the skintight black number that came with my costume.  So, since that ordeal has been dealt with, I am moving on to planning our makeup, my favorite part.

On another note, a picture of the new Tokidoki Barbie doll.

I think she is adorable, but she has caused quite a bit of controversy.  Barbies were made to encourage little girls' imaginations pertaining to their own futures, therefore they are made to look like different versions of "grown-ups".  If parents think this doll is an inappropriate role model for their children, the purchase is up to them.  If Mattel takes this doll off the shelves because of the controversy, what is next?  Wash-off tattoos?  (I secretly get a kick out of the spiky puppy's name - Bastardino.  Is it too late to rename my two-year-old pomeranian?)  I also kind of want her outfit.  Next year's Halloween costume?  I've always needed an excuse for a pink wig.

What a week.

Hey dolls!  So sorry for being M.I.A. but seriously, I'm going to put my excuses in list format because they are many and legit.

1.  Monday:  A hair appointment, a fabulous run (almost 5 miles in 45 minutes, a first for me), and the news that I'd already found a new job as a receptionist at a salon were followed by a heinous migraine resulting in bed rest until the following morning.

2.  Tuesday:  Anyone who has had a migraine can probably relate to the "hangover" the next day.  Unfortunately this hangover occurred on the first day of my new job, which also lasted around ten hours.  However, as bad as I felt, I absolutely LOVE it, but was thoroughly exhausted by the time I arrived home.  I slept better than I have in months, though.

3.  Wednesday:  Ken drove me to the doctor an hour and a half away to have an I.U.D. inserted.  (I hope that's not too much information because it is necessary to this particular excuse.)  We were in a pretty big city, so we had a really fun afternoon planned after my appointment, but all that was ruined because I was in horrible pain despite the Valium the very thoughtful nurses gave me.  I have a newfound respect for women who have babies, because that is as close to contractions as I can even imagine getting.  Luckily for me and Ken, we now have up to five years before we have to worry about babies because of this day of cramps.  I spent the afternoon sleeping off the pain.

4.  Thursday:  Day two of my job went even better than the first, thanks to the agony of the migraine and the I.U.D. both being gone, but it was yet another ten hour workday (please understand dolls, I have never really worked, so ten hours is a long day for me) so I was asleep almost before I got home.

Poor Barbie in the real world.

So, except for Monday, I haven't run all week and I've definitely eaten myself silly (because Ben & Jerry's Half Baked goes really well with that poor little ol' me attitude), but I've taken today to whip myself back into shape.  Well, I didn't run because after taking a few days off, it's awfully hard to get back into it, but I will Monday, promise.  Not only did I clean my house, I gave myself a facial and a manicure and pedicure with O.P.I.'s Suzi Skis in the Pyrenees Suede (a gorgeous matte-finish shimmering charcoal), did my brows, whitened my teeth, exfoliated, shaved, deep conditioned and blew out my hair, fake baked, and moisturized, all to my own relief, not to mention my husband, who has stood by me, bless his heart, throughout this horrible and simultaneously wonderful week.

Here's to an amazing weekend and an even better week.

XOXO

Bittersweet.

I was let go from my job of two and a half years today.  I've worked in a little Vietnamese-run nail and tanning shop for what seems like a lifetime, and I am pretty heartbroken.  It was time, inevitable really, because a bigger nail shop came to our little town and stole all of our customers.  "My people" have become like family to me, so even though I knew it was coming, I cried a little.

However, I am two weeks away from having my Esthetician license and being on the hunt for my first real job.  I am allowing myself tonight to feel sorry for myself, drink vodka tonics, pig out, and do some online window shopping, before I start thinking of this as a mini-vacation prior to beginning my life as an adult.  The next couple of weeks are going to be all about preparation for my career as a professional beautify-er.

Bring on the research, cover letters, and resumes.  And I might even do something to my hair.  Because I can multitask like that.

I run, I eat, I shop.

I am a makeup artist and soon-to-be licensed esthetician living in possibly the second smallest town in the southeastern United States, in love with and very opinionated about all things makeup and fashion.  I am an intense perfectionist hellbent on throwing myself through rings of fire for the sake of beauty.  As you can probably already tell, I am just a little bit vain, which I promise is what will make this blog interesting - vanity leads to a lot of funny stories.  I am a blonde, inside and (most of the time) out.

I take care of my version of Ken, our darling little pomeranian, Dolce, and our teeny white trailer we live in while we save for our Dream House.  In order to help speed this process along, I am on the hunt for my first real grownup job.  I am a runner, but only because I am an eater.  I adore food, especially sushi, bread, and wine.

So dolls, in summary, here is what you have to look forward to:  entertaining anecdotes about my blonde vanity, makeup reviews, shopping hauls, and bitching about my runs followed by detailed descriptions of whatever I stuff my face with that day, all told in a sweet Southern accent (or at least that's what I hear).  Enjoy!

Mrs. Barbie

I am officially married and back on the blogging scene.  My husband is thrilled that it's all finally over with, and I've been trying to throw subtle hints at my sister's boyfriend to propose already because I'm ready to plan another wedding!!
A quick update:  I made a huge life decision and have decided to go to esthetician school instead of finishing my fashion degree.  So get ready for lots of posts on make-up, waxings, and making people purteeeeeeee!!
Because Barbie is back.  With a gazillion thank you notes to write.  Oh gosh, I'm really going to do my best not to abandon y'all again!!

Oh, Karma!!

"America is very blessed - yes, we have our own issues, & yes, we should do more to make those issues better, but we did not just lose 200,000 residents due to an earthquake. We SHOULD be helping those countries less fortunate than us. Someday we may need this type of assistance. Regardless of the problems in your own family, you'd try to help another hurting family. THAT is what America is doing with Haiti."

(I typed everything I felt, and then Facebook told me it was almost double the characters allowed for a status, so that was definitely an abbreviated version of my feelings.)


I HATE politics!!  I try to avoid at all costs two things:  conflict, and talking about politics.  (Both make me want to cry.)


Unfortunately or fortunately, I have some really strong feelings about being nice.  Nice is such a general word, boring maybe, and in writing, much too vague of a word to use, well, really ever, but that's what I am and what I believe in.

Karma is so real - what goes around, comes around.  I help you, you help me, we become BFF's, we love each other until we are chasing each other around in our wheelchairs at the nursing home.  Or something like that.


The world is becoming more and more like a single country every day.  We are more united than we have ever been thanks to technology.  What happens in another country concerns and affects us, and what happens in America concerns and affects every other nation in the world.  

So why is helping people who have been affected by a horrific natural disaster any different than one family in a neighborhood helping the other?  Every family has their own problems, but we are well past the time when we could just be concerned with our own.  The world is nothing but families separated by water, and if I've learned one thing from living in the South, it's that every family is related way back.  If the United States were devastated by an earthquake, any natural disaster, or a terrorist attack (9/11?), so many of the same people who are frustrated with America's providing help to Haiti would be appalled that other countries in the world did not rush to our aid.  I'm sure everyone remembers how angry people were when France did not support our "war on terrorism" after September 11th.  

How can we possibly expect others to help us if we throw our noses in the air and turn our backs on other places in need?  How can we even be taken seriously as a country?


Seeing what has happened in Haiti has broken my heart, and although everyone is entitled to their own opinion, karma is a bitch.  


So, this Barbie doll has had her fill of politics AND conflict for the year now.  Expect nothing but pink and shopping and fun from now on!!

Breaking Up With Mr. Cig

Mr. Cig and I were together for a long time.  Two years at least, off and on.  He was usually right there when I needed him, and if not, all I had to do was jump in my car and drive about half a mile down the road - he was always waiting for me.  Besides his constant availability, Mr. Cig was filthy smoking hot!!

Our relationship was getting expensive though, and I knew that deep down, Mr. Cig was a bad boy.  He never missed a party, stayed at the bars until closing time, and I swear I saw him in the backseat of a friend's car.  There was even a rumor going around that he was a murderer, but I never saw that side of him.  He was what shortened a long day at work, calmed me down when I was stressed, and brightened my mornings.  His only downside - he kind of smelled.

I ended things with Mr. Cig on Sunday night pretty abruptly.  New year, new me, right?  And he was bad for me, and I felt strong, and just like that, we were done!!

I see him everywhere now!!  It's driving me crazy - and he looks even sexier now than he ever did while we were together.  I feel like maybe we didn't have a proper good-bye, like maybe we should try it again and this time I could really just savor our last minutes together.  Like Sunday wasn't the best day for a breakup.

My therapist, Mr. Nick Patch, has suggested daily appointments for about two months.  Four days down.